A deep question to ponder about

Let's say there are 2 people. They have the exact same thoughts and personality. They are the same person with one tiny difference. 

They have mean and cruel thoughts. 

But only one of them acts on them. 

The other keeps those thoughts to them. 

This is my question, is one meaner than the other? 

Or are they equal in being "a bad" person. 

Is it our actions that claim who we are? 

Or the thoughts? 

Both? 

Neither? 

My latest goal is to be as selfless as possible. Others come first. I don't think like that enough these days. For example: I notice that sometimes (if I'm upset with a person or whatever) i have that urge to say something bratty or be a wimp about it. but I tell myself to either not say anything at all. Or I do the opposite, do something extremely nice. 

No matter what though I still had that thought of anger, and being upset with that person. Even if I didn't actually act on my emotions.

If I had, I'm still the same person. 

So is it our actions or our thoughts that prove how much of a good person we are?